Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Minor Meltdown

I'm having a minor meltdown today. My hours at work, which are never consistent because I do private home healthcare, have been cut from 67 hours at the beginning of this week to a mere 18 hours. Right before Christmas. To say the least, I'm stressed out. However, I do have faith that everything will work out, as it always does. My agency respects me and generally overloads me with hours for shifts. This one is out of their hands as it is a case where the other caregivers are self-employeed and don't work through an agency. A few weeks ago I had a boat load of hours, then no hours, then a boat load of hours. That darn family needs to make up their minds and figure things out. My bank account can't handle the big fat middle finger I've just been given.

So, I'm over my panic moment and back to where I need to be. I've been in these situations before and it always works out. I've been with my agency for 3 years now and they always come through even when it's at the very last minute. I'm reliable, I go in at the last minute, and I never call off. Now that I've had my few breaths, I'm okay. I had a 30 minute cry over it all and I'm back to having faith, like usual. Things work out the way they're supposed to work out and I know that.

I HAVE BEEN ACCEPTED TO NURSING SCHOOL!!!! I called yesterday and they confirmed! The last time I was in the office the secretary said I could call on the 13th (the day they mail out the letters) and ask because once they mail out the letters it becomes putlic knowledge and they can officially confirm. So I did! I was shaking and so nervous and was going to just wait until the letter came in the mail, but, I couldn't so I called. I'm really excited and feel like my life finally has some definite direction. And, when you put in the hard work you tend to get positive results.

I remember what life before I got sober and I could have never jumped through these hoops. Two entrance exams, blood work, transcripts, immunizations, photos, background checks. It would have been half-assed and at the last moment when it all seemed too much, I would have given up. It just goes to show you how much a person can change, given the chance.

Well, I'm off to dinner with my sponsor, then to my homegroup, and after to meet a friend at a speaker meeting. I need it today.


  1. Well done on being accepted to nursing school. I qualified as a nurse. I got sober in twenties and managed to get accepted into nursing training. I relapsed after a few months into the course; at the time I felt that being sober meant missing out on all the fun - what a joke. I somehow managed to muddle through all the way to RGN, but I missed out on a lot of opportunities because of my drinking.

    For a long time I was dependent on agency work; I know how hard it can be when the shifts dry up. I live in Thailand but would go back to Ireland to nurse for a couple of months each year. I've had to leave nursing now because there just isn't the work anymore; I've also too many other commitments. I’ll miss nursing though. Good luck with your training - exciting times.

  2. I doubt that anyone was really giving you the great big middle finger. LOL

    You can use this ........
    Everything works out in the end. If it hasn't worked out, it's not the end.

  3. OH yes, I know. lol. Everything does work out how it's supposed to. The good thing to come out of it, now that I've stepped back from it, is that I can now attend the Big Book meeting again that I had to miss because of work. I'm just meant to be there!

    And, I live in Florida, so there is an abundance of nursing opportunities! I essentially live in "Gods Waiting Room" so work does always end up popping up for me, but I hit that panic moment earlier and it hasn't happened in quite a while for me.

    Too much has been happening lately and I've become overwhelmed. So I definitely believe that I need this little bit of time off to rest up and get back on track with everything.

    Thanks for commenting! You've helped brighten my evening.