I'm exhausted. Completely. Totally. Exhausted. 80 hours is just too much to work in one week. Not to mention that they're all overnight shifts. Thank God it's only for one week and it's a means to an end. It's going to pay for 2 entrance exams, a physical, and a background check so that I may go back to school again.
My last sponsee moved away on Thursday. I miss her dearly; it's been a long few months but we've spent so much time together and I feel a bit of a void now that she's gone. She has turned into a great friend. Apparently, where she moved to, the meetings are quite different. They're all an hour and a half long instead of an hour and they do things quite differently. She has found a new sponsor, taking the suggestion of raising her hand and announcing that it was her first meeting out of treatment; but already she feels it's not the right person. The amazing thing is that she is really putting herself out there during a very vulnerable time in an entirely new existence. I'm so pround of her.
And, onto me. Overall, things are good. Cats are good;boyfriend is good. But, I'm so tired. I feel burried in chores and goals and errands and just things to do. I work 12-14 hour overnight shifts and try to sleep at least 6 hours a day at home (which doesn't always happen). So, I spend most nights going over my test prep books, studying the night away. I've done what I always do and I need to find a way to not put everything off until the last minute. I have until December 3rd to take 2 exams, get a physical, and a background check. The idea of school is getting scarier as the deadline nears. The good thing is that I haven't become paralyzed by this fear yet.
So, for now, I've lost my spunk. My wit. My general-funness. I've got 2 more nights of work and then 2 days off.
Powerlessness - Focusing on ourselves
1 day ago